An Open Letter to a Hurting Husband
I know that you are hurting in your marriage. And I realize that it might seem easier to just walk away.
But you haven’t.
I commend you for that because God doesn’t walk away from His covenant partner, either.
Although there has been pain in your marriage, you can have immense hope in the unfailing goodness of God. As you seek to honor God in your marriage, you can be confident that God will enable you to do that. The Scriptures give this encouragement to you:
Do not be discouraged, and do not be dismayed, for the LORD your God fights for you.
God’s heart is for you. He is for healing. God has obligated Himself to act on behalf of those who are in covenant with Him.
Author and pastor Dave Harvey says,
God is completely, totally, enthusiastically supportive of your every effort to build a strong, God-glorifying marriage.
You can succeed.
You are able to succeed powerfully as a husband. God has created your spirit for strength and for greatness. Regardless of your wife’s actions, you can excel as a husband through your commitment and devotion to her.
This success as a husband is rooted in your commitment to God. It is not based on your wife’s reaction or behavior.
Marriage is not something you wrestle out with your wife; marriage is something you wrestle out with God, just as Jacob did at the Jabbok River. Wrestle until you are able to submit to the blessing.
You succeed as a husband as you remember your pledge before God in the presence of witnesses to love this woman and to be faithful to her “till death do you part.” You remember that you made a sacred vow; and by the enabling of the Spirit of God Himself, you stand with strength to fulfill that pledge.
You commit to fulfill your solemn oath with honor and with integrity, regardless of the cost, because mighty men of God choose to act as God Himself acts. As bearers of His image, godly men uphold covenant promises as God does: with steadfast faithfulness, unintimidated by the threat of loss and undeterred by the pain of sacrifice.
You succeed as a man of strength and greatness when you say to your wife:
I am completely committed to you.
I am devoted to you and to you alone. I have no “back-up” plans.
Even if you reject me, ….